This Valentine...
Its our first valentine since the engagement. It has been a month now and I still can't believe it. We are engaged. I just love this word but its hard to admit it like most men. Its like a licence to Talk.
Someone once explained to me that I was not just a Human, but a Human Resource. Their are people dependent on me and I should concentrate on my studies. Girls are worthless. He added.
It appears he was right except for the 'worthless' part. The sentence lost its meaning the moment I saw you.
What started as a “stupid” love letter is slowly transforming into happily ever after. It might come as a surprise to you for what I have to add now but it's about time, I get honest. It doesn't matter if we ever get married. What mattered was your acceptance. It's not important to materialistically achieve a target. Rather satisfaction of it being within your reach and leaving it on your own will is important. But this doesn't imply that in any way my affection for you has been diminished even by a bit.
Remember when I asked you for the coffee (in person not with “stupid” letter, as you termed it later) and you said “Okay”. And I always wonder what of my few and circumspect actions had earned me the cherished adjective. It was by far the best day of my life. I still bear in mind the soft smile you gave with your expressive eyes. It was one of those May afternoons when its hard to believe Indian idiom “The Monsoon is coming”. Streets were deserted except for us. Silence was dispersed all over the place. For a brief moment I thought I heard clouds approaching. Although not a 'CCD' or 'Starbucks', I consider it was the best coffee I will ever have again. “Wait till you have a sip of Starbucks”(when it comes to India) some may comment. Well no matter what, it will always lack one ingredient that is the nectar of My victory, at least I consider it to be one.
I mean everyone has that one special coffee, even if its not as special as “My First Cup” with Deepika. I still have bill by the way. Not as a reminder of how much it cost me or even to bring to mind that beautiful day because that, I can not forget. But only as a prized possession of your acceptance.
Did it ever occur to you why I proposed you in the most mediocre way possibe and not with the fancy hotel and a shiny ring. Because that is who I am. The most common(mediocre) man. There is nothing special about me except “you”. I wonder what you saw in me. You must have figured it out by now. By the way the ring I gave you, is not at all ancestral(Honesty! strikes again). Anyway I did follow the unwritten “3-months-salary” rule and believe me its bounteous.
But there is one thing in me which is although very common but rarely found. Many people are brave, some are extremely honest, and some stupidly arrogant. People can't change these qualities, its born with them and it will die with them. So is the capability to love someone. In short not everyone has what it takes to be a “Devdas”. People are born with it. Although everyone(thanks to Bollywood) seem to be “I can do anything for you” guy. These are the kind rarely found. I don't brag about being the one, as one of my friend does and may be he is. But somehow I find this quality of mine, certainly resonates with very high amplitudes when it matches your natural frequency.
The thing about Devdas, love letters etc. I am not sure why I think like this. Spare me for these. May be its because I grew up listening to songs like “Adayein bhi hain, Nazakat bhi hai..” or “Dil, Jigar, Nazar Kya Hai...”. Come to think of it and you notice these are the numbers still popular amongst common India.
As far as we are talking about honesty. We must accept facts. This one is gonna hurt, but if I am not David Schwimmer you are no Jennifer Aniston. That doesn't change anything. The fact is that “I Love You” and nothing can change that. I cannot define Love I am not such a great thinker. I only know that its hard for me to part with what I feel about you(Filmy dialogue).
This and much more is what I thought I would say to you. But I suppose that is not gonna materialize now. So On this Valentine when it starts for everyone else. For us It all Ends
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Friday, January 13, 2012
Travelogue
As we grounded in Delhi and I made my way towards Metro Expressway I said what I always said to myself “I freaking live in Harappa”. Only an hour later standing on New Delhi Railway Station sweating and gasping for air I realised Angkor Wat was a better example than Harappa with its greenery and all. Scene is almost the same at any Railway station In India, with people trying to bribe the TTE for a seat, but only in Delhi the percentage of fair skins outnumber the brown ones. In fact some of them were so beautiful, I even considered giving mine seat to them if they agreed to share. But then a reserved seat in Indian Rail booked months before and a beautiful girl not ready to share the same. Well the choice was easy.
The night was quite only up to the moment my alibi decided to make it more interesting by making me listen to the songs he has decided will be played in his marriage. I am quite sure he downloaded it from some site named bug-your-friends-with-these-songs.com. After an hour or so when he realised I was sufficiently harassed he switched to upgraded version of torture.
“So what do you want to do with your life?”
“Well to be precise I am not quite sure”. How could I answer when I myself was searching for the same.
“Why don't prepare for CAT” came the obvious suggestion. God I am done taking advices.
“I don't know I don' think I am capable enough. Why don't we go to sleep. It's a long day tomorrow” I said trying to wind up the conversation.
Strangely he agreed. But only before he gave a long list of other option to think about and how I should take the decision now before its too late. Me, not taking a clue of what he was speaking rather wondering how confidently he spoke. Why didn't he chose law as a career. I mean seriously with the firmness and suave he speaks he would have been a good lawyer or a politician. And his voice, girls just love that deep voice.
The leopard story was the first thing served to us as we reached my friend's 3 BHK apartment in Dehradun early morning. Seriously dude cut the crap. To top that he repeated the story at least a quadruple times, when no one paid any attention. As if that will make it believable. I can't blame him, for his reprised stories had always been a cause of concern for us. Come to think of it so had been mine.
So, while everyone was busy getting ready for yet another journey at 9. One of my friend was comfortable enough not going to toilet in morning. As according to him government had spent so much money on public toilets and they are available any time of the day. Weird theories.
Chakrata is the little hill station we reached just on the time for a late lunch before heading for some near by fall. Journey to the falls was incidentless except when some one tried to be a stuntman jumping off stones showing excitement and finally tumbled in water. I laughed my heart out that proves that it was not me. Really the inner satisfaction you get when someone tries to be a hero and then falls of a banana peel is just priceless.
One of us brought a Rs. 45,000 camera and was trying to capture any thing that makes him look like a real photographer. Or for that matter taking pictures in the pose that makes him look like a real one. While we wait posing stupidly before he decides if the light is either too much or too little, flash should be On or Off and endless other trivialities. It turns out most of the pictures come out shaky and rest having only the background with people either too shadowy or too small, smiling foolishly looking in to the lens.
In the night ours was the only room order for 6 cups of tea while every other occupied room was being served with alcohol.
In the morning we could see Himalyan mountains glowing in the morning light like melted gold was being poured on them and........... well you will not be seeing any more of these because I am not a travelogue writer. What I am trying to write is about the people who matter to me.
Early breakfast of Aloo paratha and boiled eggs in the midst of chilling winds was awesome. Before our driver came to say that our vehicle broke down. With no other option before a vehicle could be arranged we sat down having pointless discussions. Conclusion of which came out to be that the compensatory leaves I apply for was same as that of a labours (My job= Labour job if we formulate it). I claimed that since I was working in shifts I had privilege to this kind of leaves. People claimed that they too were working in shifts but are not entitled to such low category leaves.Well working in shifts that does not include night and getting Saturday-Sunday's off . Well my friend that is a joke not a shift job. It is not that I am very proud of my round the clock shift job but seriously dude 'If you don't know the move please don't groove' (Yes I invented it myself....thanks for the applause.)
Somehow another vehicle was arranged for us to return only after visiting a few other scenic places and a lot of other incidences. We returned to Delhi. From there I flew back to Harappa sorry Angkor Wat with a smile on my face which will fade away once I am bound to my routine freaking round the clock shift job. But these memories keep my heart warm from the inside. The journey was terrific only because people I was with were awesome. Truly awesome. Just below the Kung-fu Panda awesomeness.
The night was quite only up to the moment my alibi decided to make it more interesting by making me listen to the songs he has decided will be played in his marriage. I am quite sure he downloaded it from some site named bug-your-friends-with-these-songs.com. After an hour or so when he realised I was sufficiently harassed he switched to upgraded version of torture.
“So what do you want to do with your life?”
“Well to be precise I am not quite sure”. How could I answer when I myself was searching for the same.
“Why don't prepare for CAT” came the obvious suggestion. God I am done taking advices.
“I don't know I don' think I am capable enough. Why don't we go to sleep. It's a long day tomorrow” I said trying to wind up the conversation.
Strangely he agreed. But only before he gave a long list of other option to think about and how I should take the decision now before its too late. Me, not taking a clue of what he was speaking rather wondering how confidently he spoke. Why didn't he chose law as a career. I mean seriously with the firmness and suave he speaks he would have been a good lawyer or a politician. And his voice, girls just love that deep voice.
The leopard story was the first thing served to us as we reached my friend's 3 BHK apartment in Dehradun early morning. Seriously dude cut the crap. To top that he repeated the story at least a quadruple times, when no one paid any attention. As if that will make it believable. I can't blame him, for his reprised stories had always been a cause of concern for us. Come to think of it so had been mine.
So, while everyone was busy getting ready for yet another journey at 9. One of my friend was comfortable enough not going to toilet in morning. As according to him government had spent so much money on public toilets and they are available any time of the day. Weird theories.
Chakrata is the little hill station we reached just on the time for a late lunch before heading for some near by fall. Journey to the falls was incidentless except when some one tried to be a stuntman jumping off stones showing excitement and finally tumbled in water. I laughed my heart out that proves that it was not me. Really the inner satisfaction you get when someone tries to be a hero and then falls of a banana peel is just priceless.
One of us brought a Rs. 45,000 camera and was trying to capture any thing that makes him look like a real photographer. Or for that matter taking pictures in the pose that makes him look like a real one. While we wait posing stupidly before he decides if the light is either too much or too little, flash should be On or Off and endless other trivialities. It turns out most of the pictures come out shaky and rest having only the background with people either too shadowy or too small, smiling foolishly looking in to the lens.
In the night ours was the only room order for 6 cups of tea while every other occupied room was being served with alcohol.
In the morning we could see Himalyan mountains glowing in the morning light like melted gold was being poured on them and........... well you will not be seeing any more of these because I am not a travelogue writer. What I am trying to write is about the people who matter to me.
Early breakfast of Aloo paratha and boiled eggs in the midst of chilling winds was awesome. Before our driver came to say that our vehicle broke down. With no other option before a vehicle could be arranged we sat down having pointless discussions. Conclusion of which came out to be that the compensatory leaves I apply for was same as that of a labours (My job= Labour job if we formulate it). I claimed that since I was working in shifts I had privilege to this kind of leaves. People claimed that they too were working in shifts but are not entitled to such low category leaves.Well working in shifts that does not include night and getting Saturday-Sunday's off . Well my friend that is a joke not a shift job. It is not that I am very proud of my round the clock shift job but seriously dude 'If you don't know the move please don't groove' (Yes I invented it myself....thanks for the applause.)
Somehow another vehicle was arranged for us to return only after visiting a few other scenic places and a lot of other incidences. We returned to Delhi. From there I flew back to Harappa sorry Angkor Wat with a smile on my face which will fade away once I am bound to my routine freaking round the clock shift job. But these memories keep my heart warm from the inside. The journey was terrific only because people I was with were awesome. Truly awesome. Just below the Kung-fu Panda awesomeness.
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